


Make answer, Muse

by thegreatpumpkin



Series: I teach thee how [2]
Category: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: M/M, epistolary fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-28
Updated: 2016-11-28
Packaged: 2018-09-02 17:38:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8676667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegreatpumpkin/pseuds/thegreatpumpkin
Summary: Elladan's writing a lot of letters.A brief epistolary interlude following O truant muse--wherein Elladan and Gustav make plans, Elladan and Elrohir argue inheritance, and Gustav solicits dick pics.





	

**Author's Note:**

> There will be a real sequel someday, but in the meantime, have a brief aperitif.

Dear Gustav,

I am not known, among my friends, as a prolific letter-writer. In fact, my brother has accused me on more than one occasion of intentionally losing his missives when one of us is away so that I’m not obligated to reply. (Of course you know I would never misplace one of Elrohir’s letters, tidy and exacting person that I am.)

But I suppose I must have finally found my epistolary stride (yes, I had to ask Elrohir whether there was an adjective that meant letter-related), since I’m writing two for every one of yours.

Or perhaps—can it be? Have I finally found someone even worse at correspondence than I am? They said it could not be done! And yet here, on this proud day, we have achieved miracles. It’s a wonder what can be accomplished with dedication and the power of friendship.

We’ll be riding out against the orcs again once the year turns over, after which it will be much more difficult to receive letters. Write me already.

Yours,  
Elladan Elrondion

* * *

Elladan,

Some of us have professions, lordling.

Consider the difficulty of carrying on one’s own correspondence when charged with riding all over Arda ferrying about everyone else’s. Then further consider the fact that my own father has only had two letters from me, as compared to your five, and I’ve seen him barely more than I’ve seen you in the last year. Which is to say, I’ve hardly been at liberty to write since departing from Imladris and I’ve still written you more than my own flesh and blood, so keep your robes on.

On second thought, I retract that last statement. Take your robes off. You probably keep an artist around, don’t you? That’s the sort of frivolous thing high and mighty lordlings do. Have your lordly artist-in-residence make me a dramatic rendering of your lack of robes. You never know, it might increase the urgency of my replies.

Will you be hunting the entire summer? I’m usually at home for a few weeks near Midsummer, since everyone’s more willing to travel for their conversations. I might have a bit of time to show an arrogant peacock of a lord’s son the sights, if he decided to burden us with his presence. Not that I’d enjoy it, mind, but these are the sacrifices I make for diplomacy.

I hope you receive this in time to let me know whether you plan to inconvenience me this summer. If not, I suppose you may still come unannounced, but don’t expect a royal welcome.

Gustav Sebastianion,  
who hopes you are practicing your pronunciation

* * *

Gustav,

My father is a respected patron of the arts, it is true, and I am sure there exists at least one artist in Imladris who could be bribed into off-the-books portraiture. Unfortunately, that takes time, and your letter arrived on the eve of our departure. Even now Elrohir is checking over his weapons and gear with an unnecessary amount of noise and throat-clearing, which is his subtle way of saying I need to stop writing letters and get back to preparing.

So I’ll be brief: we usually come home over Midsummer, because even a very dedicated orc-slayer needs a holiday now and then. There has been more orc activity than we’d like near the road between our lands and Bree, so we’ll focus on clearing the way for travelers this season, and when Elrohir’s ready to ride home I’ll take the road on to Mithlond.

Since I have given notice, I do expect a royal welcome. Very technically speaking, I’m second in line for High Kingship of the Noldor, you know.

Yours,  
His Nearly-Royal Highness, Elladan I

P.S. If you like, you might direct a letter to the outpost near the Mitheithel Bridge. We restock there sometimes, during our hunts, when the game is poor or we’re too occupied with the orcs to hunt anything for eating.

* * *

Elladan,

Nice try. By my reckoning, unless your father recently took up Gil-galad’s crown and is keeping it quiet, you’re third in line for a defunct kingship. Does Elrohir know you’re trying to supplant him?

Gustav Sebastianion,  
First son and heir to his father’s empire of cabinetry

* * *

My dear Gustav, Heir Apparent to the Cabinet Imperium,

I hope this letter finds you well!

Imagine my surprise to find my own brother is staging a coup against me! I opened your letter quite innocently—the man at the outpost said it had been given to him for the sons of Elrond, of which I am one—and while I admit upon opening it I realized it was not meant for me, I could not help seeing my name and then was obliged to carry on reading.

I commend your knowledge of the Imladris hierarchy, specifically with regards to matters of birth order. I also commend your unwillingness to let Elladan get away with anything. One does have to keep him under tight rein, as you already know.

~~Do you happen to know if he~~  
~~Has he said anything about when we~~  
~~It’s just that I thought he and I~~

I apologize for all the blots, there’s not much extra paper to be had while we’re hunting so I’ve got to keep the mistakes. What I mean to say is that I’m happy you’re corresponding; I think it does him good to expand his circle beyond Imladris’ citizens and those few rough souls we encounter on our hunts. Please feel free to take him down a peg at any time—but also pray remember, if you cause him any genuine grief, I will haunt you to the ends of the earth.

Elrohir,  
First son and theoretical contender for royal status

* * *

Elrohir, son of Elrond, who I note is still not the High King,

You’re both as bad as the other! If you expect me to believe that you read that letter out of ignorance, you must have forgotten who you’re dealing with. Someone needs to watch the two of you every minute. For now you’ll have to keep eyes on one another, since I can’t be in two places at once. At any rate, don’t expect me to conspire in your snooping any more than I will in Elladan’s coup.

You really didn’t need to go to all the trouble, anyway. I would have sent you a letter of your very own if only you’d asked. I have enough ink for both of you, after all. (Speaking of ink, don’t waste yours on nonsense. I don’t believe your brother needs defending, and if he does, hardly from me.)

Now behave yourselves.

Or don’t, but at least write me with the details.

Gustav Sebastianion,  
who may not be royal but is still quite busy and important,  
and does not have time to come teach you another lesson right now


End file.
